Feel the Fear
I once got into a discussion with someone about what we each thought was the most powerful human emotion, and some controversy ensued when I stated I thought it was fear. All animals, regardless of species, have a capacity to feel fear, and it keeps them alive in order to prolong the species. Love and hate are powerful, yes, but the atrocities committed by mankind often have their roots in fear – fear of a misunderstood Other, or fear of something being taken away.
Writers know all about fear. Love and hate inspire us to do things, to create great works of fiction, and to delve into the inner life of all humans to explore just what makes us tick. Fear? It stops us writing in the first place. We’re scared that if we do, people won’t like what we write. Maybe we won’t be able to finish that full-length novel. Hell, maybe we’re scared that people will like what we write to such an extent that our lives are changed forever.
So what is my greatest fear as a writer? If I’m honest, I don’t actually know. I’m not necessarily a person motivated by fear to start with. I’m motivated by wanting to learn as much as I possibly can in the short span of time I’m on this planet. Sure things scare me, but I always take the attitude that I’d rather give something a go and fail spectacularly than let fear hold me back and always wonder what might have been. Besides, I spend my spare time in known poltergeist locations – what have I got to be scared about?
Still, it’s all very well to be pragmatic but yes, I do still have fears. I worry people won’t like what I’ve written, and I do get scared that something I put out there for public consumption will meet a negative response. However, I think my real fear is never quite being good enough. I talked about this a bit last month when I discussed why I thought I couldn’t bring myself to finish my WiP. A worry that the book won’t fulfil its potential is not far off a fear that what I write will ultimately be appalling. I read so many other excellent stories and then read mine and think “I’m scared people will realise I’m a rubbish writer.”
So what to do! Well there’s clearly only one thing I can do. “Feel the fear…and do it anyway”. No one else can do this but me. I can’t sit here like some 1940s silver screen damsel, expecting someone to sweep me off my feet and make everything work out well in the end. I chose to be a writer, and that means I chose all the competing neuroses that go with it. So what if I’m scared that people won’t like my work, or that they’ll criticise my work? Let them! It’s their right to dislike my work, just as much as it’s my right to keep producing it.
That’s what I’ll tell myself at 2am when I’m sat staring at a blank screen, wondering why I’m wasting my life…
Thanks for the blog Icy!! Yes, the fear, I feel it too! A friend and I were talking about this very thing the other day and I said I’m scared to write some days because it’ll be rubbish , she said just keeping writing, and I said ‘But somebody might read it!!”
I like your ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’ I think we have to because we HAVE TO write!!
Look forward to your next blog
I don’t know why we never take the attitude that just because we’ve written something doesn’t mean we have to show it to anyone! If we write only for ourselves and others end up liking it, then awesome.
It’s such a dichotomy: we want people to read our work, yet we are fearful of their response.
Keep on writing. I’ll be reading.
Adam B @revhappiness
Supervillains can’t really show fear. So I have to keep writing.
I’ve read that there are only two emotions, love and fear, and the rest all flow from them. Fear is the oldest because it is a survival instinct, but love can overcome it, so perhaps it is stronger.
Writers have a lot of fears. Most are unfounded. The answer is always to write. “I’m not good enough.” Write more, you’ll improve.
“I’m writing rubbish today.” Write anyway. I’ve found that if you give yourself free rein, the “crap” tightens up rather quickly, once you stop thinking about how crappy it will be.
My lovely mentor Janette Dalgliesh encourages her clients to find their fears and love them for what they are–protective mechanisms. Let ourselves know the fears no longer serve their purposes and work to release them.
Once you get writing and you’re in the zone, the door’s shut to fear. It only comes back in if we invite it across the threshold.
Shockingly, I’m never “in the zone” but that’s just how my mind works. I have to rewrite sentences while I’m still writing them, or I can’t progress (weirdly enough). I’m constantly criticising my own work but at the same time, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t do that, and if I’m not me, then I couldn’t write…so if I want one, I have to take the other.
Yeah, I can relate to that, Icy.
The thing that keeps me writing is… knowledge of my own mortality. Which, I suppose, is something like fear of death. But only fear of death BEFORE I’ve had the chance to write the stuff I need to write. Fear of not leaving a legacy, maybe? Fear of running out of time? I’m very aware of the clock ticking down.
I suppose I also fear not writing down THE idea which is why I write down everything. There’s never enough time.
Fear is the root of almost every emotion. Once you harness that, you’ve got it licked.
I’ll tell you how I get on with finding a solution
Oh yes, I know all too well about fear for it is THE reason I am blocked at the moment.
I already went through one huge colossal failure: I spent over 3 years writing my last WiP only to re-read the last draft and realise I was not happy AT ALL with the story. Now, I have to come up with a new version, and haven’t been able to write at all, the more I try, the more block I am getting…sigh
I’d recommend you take a break from it, and work on something else. Come back to it fresh.
“Feel the fear…and do it anyway”.
I’m afraid of heights and the telephone -my two most debilitating fears outside of writing. But I don’t really care about the view from the a cable car over a gorge and since text messaging and email came into existence, I can get around the telephone mostly.
Alan Baxter wrote a few months ago: “The day you stop feeling insecure in your work is the day you don’t care any more. May that day never come. I’ve never met a writer yet who didn’t feel that way and work on despite it.”
Fear and insecurity go hand in hand. So I guess if you feel insecure and afraid it means you still care… care that what you produce is top quality, that people will enjoy it, that it will sell etc etc.
It makes your statement all the more… important. Essential!
“Feel the fear… and do it anyway”. It’s going up on my wall above my desk!
It’s a basic motto, but it’s one that I feel does the trick.
I stumbled upon this post and I thank you for writing it. Sometimes it is so hard to separate the wanting the write from the wanting people to read what I write. But if I write for other people, my writing is not true. I love the affirmation “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.” When I first read Susan Jeffers amazing book, I was really struggling to find my writer’s voice. That book and phrase really helped.
Funny thing is, there will always be an audience for what you write, so technically, whatever you write is bound to go down well with someone.